Murphy's Laws of the Physical World
Everyone knows Murphy's Law: "Anything
that can go wrong, will..." - Here are some other Laws you may not have heard!
These tech-centric jokes,
song parodies, anecdotes and assorted humor have been collected from friends and
websites across the Internet. This humor is light-hearted and sometimes slightly
offensive to the easily-offended, so you are forewarned. It is all workplace-safe.
- Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and
you'll have to pee.
- Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
- Law of Probability - The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.
- Law of Random Numbers - If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal and someone always answers.
- Variation Law - If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than
the one you are in now (works every time).Law of Close Encounters - The probability of meeting someone you know
increases dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
- Law of the Result - When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.
- Law of Biomechanics - The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
- The Coffee Law - As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something
which will last until the coffee is cold.
- Murphy's Law of Lockers - If there are only 2 people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.
- Law of Physical Surfaces - The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor, are
directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.
- Law of Logical Argument - Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.
- Oliver's Law of Public Speaking - A closed mouth gathers no feet.
- Wilson's Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy - As soon as you find a product that you really like, they
will stop making it.
- Doctors' Law - If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there
you'll feel better.. But don't make an appointment, and you'll stay sick.
- by Anon