The 10 Commandments of Astronomy
These tech-centric jokes,
song parodies, anecdotes and assorted humor have been collected from friends and
websites across the Internet. This humor is light-hearted and sometimes slightly
offensive to the easily-offended, so you are forewarned. It is all workplace-safe.
- Thou shalt have no white light before thee, behind thee, or to the side of thee whilst sharing the night sky
with thy fellow stargazers.
- Thou shalt not love thy telescope more than thy spouse or thy children; as much as, maybe, but not more.
Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's telescope, unless it exceeds in aperture or electronics twice that of thy
- Thou shalt not read "Astronomy" or "Sky & Telescope" on company time, for thine employer makes it possible
to continue thine astronomical hobby.
- Thou shalt have at least two telescopes so as to keep thy spouse interested when the same accompanies thee
under the night sky or on eclipse expeditions to strange lands where exotic wild animals doth roam freely.
- Thou shalt not allow either thy sons or thy daughters to get married during the Holy Days of Starfest.
- Thou shalt not reveal to thy spouse the true cost of thy telescope collection; only the individual
components, and that shall be done with great infrequency.
- Thou shalt not buy thy spouse any lenses, filters, dew shields, maps, charts, or any other necessities for
Christmas, anniversaries, or birthdays unless thy spouse needs them for their own telescope.
- Thou shalt not deceive thy spouse into thinking that ye are taking them for a romantic Saturday night drive
when indeed thou art heading for a dark sky site.
- Thou shalt not store thy telescope in thy living room, dining room, or bedroom, lest thou be sleeping with
it full time.
-...from the Astronomy Resources on the Net website