Custom Search
Over 10000 Pages Indexed
Your Host
Click here to read about RF CafeKirt
Blattenberger

... single-
handedly
redefining
what an
engineering website
should be.

View the YouTube RF Cafe Intro Video Carpe Diem!
(Seize the Day!)

5CCG (5th MOB):
My USAF radar shop

Hobby & Fun

Airplanes and Rockets:
My personal hobby website

Equine Kingdom:
My daughter Sally's horse
riding business website -
lots of info

•−•  ••−•    −•−•  •−  ••−•  •
RF Cafe Morse Code >Hear It<

Job Board

About RF Cafe©

RF Cafe E-Mail

What Resume Claims Really Mean

Take a break from the drudgery with some of these jokes, song parodies, anecdotes and assorted humor that has been collected from friends & from websites across the Internet. This humor is light-hearted and sometimes slightly offensive to the easily-offended, so you are forewarned. I have taken care to censor "humor" with overt sexual overtones (or undertones), degrading political taunts, and hateful tirades, so it is all workplace-safe. I have also tried to warn of any links that will result in audio clips so you can take appropriate precautions. Please send any potential candidates for this humor page to the e-mail link above.

Humor #1 | Humor #2 | Humor #3



What Resume Claims Really Mean - RF CafeThis list of items will help you to interpret resumes submitted by applicants to your company. If you are thinking about including any such phrases on your own resume, be aware that we're all on to you now.
  • My background and skills match your requirements:
    You're probably looking for someone more experienced.
  • I am adaptable:
    I've changed jobs a lot.
  • I am on the go:
    I'm never at my desk.
  • I'm highly motivated to succeed:
    The minute I find a better job, I'm outta there.
  • I have formal training:
    I'm a college drop-out.
  • I interact well with co-workers:
    I've been accused of sexual harassment.
  • Thank you for your time and consideration:
    Wait! Don't throw me away!
  • I look forward to hearing from you soon:
    Like, I'm gonna hold my breath waiting for your stupid form letter thanking me for my interest and wishing me luck in my future career. 
  • I know how to deal with stressful situations:
    I'm usually on Prozac. When I'm not, I take lots of cigarette and coffee breaks.
  • I I seek a job that will draw upon my strong communication & organization skills:
    I talk too much and like to tell other people what to do.
  • I'm extremely adept ad all manner of office organization:
    I've used Microsoft Office.
  • I'm honest, hard-working and dependable:
    I pilfer office supplies.
  • My pertinent work experience includes:
    I hope you don't ask me about all the McJobs I've had.
  • I take pride in my work:
    I blame others for my mistakes.
  • I'm balanced and centered:
    I'll keep crystals at my desk and do Tai Chi in the lunch room.
  • I I have a sense of humor:
    I know a lot of corny, old jokes and I tell them badly.
  • I'I'm personable:
    I give lots of unsolicited-personal advice to co-workers.

 

 

Source: December 2013 The Good Life Press

 
A Disruptive Web Presence

Custom Search
Over 10,000 pages indexed! (none duped or pirated)

Read About RF Cafe
Webmaster: Kirt Blattenberger
    KB3UON

RF Cafe Software

RF Cascade Workbook
RF Cascade Workbook is a very extensive system cascaded component Excel workbook that includes the standard Gain, NF, IP2, IP3, Psat calculations, input & output VSWR, noise BW, min/max tolerance, DC power cauculations, graphing of all RF parameters, and has a graphical block diagram tool. An extensive User's Guide is also included. - Only $35.
RF system analysis including
frequency conversion & filters

RF & EE Symbols Word
RF Stencils for Visio

Product & Service Directory
Personally Selected Manufacturers
RF Cafe T-Shirts & Mugs

RF Cafe Software

Calculator Workbook
RF Workbench
Smith Chart™ for Visio
Smith Chart™ for Excel