Take a break from the
drudgery with some of these jokes, song parodies, anecdotes and assorted humor that has been collected from friends & from websites across
the Internet. This humor is light-hearted and sometimes slightly offensive to the easily-offended, so you are forewarned. I have taken care
to censor "humor" with reproductive function innuendo and hateful tirades, so it is all workplace-safe. I have also tried to warn
of any links that will result in audio clips so you can take appropriate precautions. Please send any potential candidates for this humor page
to the e-mail link above.
Humor #1 | Humor #2 | Humor #3
A major research institution has recently
announced the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science. This new element has been tentatively named
Administratium has 1 neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 111
assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312. These 312 particles are held together by a force called
morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called
Since Administratium has no electrons,
it is inert. However, it can be detected as it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact.
amount of Administratium causes one reaction to take over 4 days to complete when
it would normally take less than a second.
Administratium has a normal
half-life of 3 years; it does not decay but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant
neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.
In fact, Administratium's
mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization causes some morons
to become neutrons, forming isodopes.
This characteristic of
moron-promotion leads some scientists to speculate that
Administratium is formed whenever morons reach
a certain quantity in concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as "Critical
Morass." You will know it when you see it.
...and thanks to Cornell for submitting it!