The 10,000-Foot View
Are people sick of hearing idiotic, worn-out catch phrases? Absolutely.
Listen to the list of action items at any all hands meeting, and
at the end of the day, you will see what I mean. At this moment in
time, there is probably an awesome class at most B Schools
titled Trite Phraseology 101. Let's back burner that issue for now since
we just don't have the bandwidth for it.
What we need is to benchmark a new best of breed set of
best practices. We need a brain dump here. "But isn't it time
we drew a line under this and moved on," you might be asking? I'll have to
call you on the carpet for that attitude. What we need is a change
agent, not just another chair at the table.
We'll circle back on that CLM (career limiting move) before
the COB (close of business). Some of you could care less, and
clearly need a Come to Jesus Meeting.
These days, our group's core competency... or core culture
if you will, seems to be a game of CYA (cover your ass). With my hectic
schedule, I just don't have the cycles for it. Our deliverables
seem to be at a disconnect with our doables. Drop
me a line with your thoughts on that. Due diligence suggests more
efforting is needed on your part by Friday EOD (end of the day).
Our dilemma is fairly unique, in that going forward what is
required is approaching the solution at a granular level. I've put a
hard stop on my available time, so someone else will have to do the
heavy lifting. This is a real hot button with upper management. Today
is hump day already, so we need to interface as necessary for
a fast solution.
I personally believe the task is a nightmare. It's not
in the budget. It's not rocket science. It is what it is,
however. I think maybe we've Jumped the Shark on this one. Let's take
this offline and leverage the synergy. Let's level the playing
field by picking the low hanging fruit. No, there is no magic
bullet, but the perfect solution to a problem will require everyone
being onboard. We must all be on the same page with this.
Our out of pocket expenses demonstrate how out of the loop
some people are. We must think outside the box rather than simply outsourcing
the solution elsewhere. I'll ping each of you to establish a price
point. Q1, Q2, Q3 & Q4 results prove that what we need right now
is a rainmaker to help ramp up the RFP (request for proposal)
rate. Results will never be scalable so long as scope creep is
allowed. Shoot me an e-mail with your thoughts. What I'm not looking for
is a shotgun approach. You shouldn't of placed your skin in
the game if you weren't up to it. No snail mail on this one, please.
A soup to nuts solution is critical to our success. Speak truth
to power when pitching your own special sauce. The issue is too vital
to table. What's the take away from this? You'll have to touch
base with all your resources in order to succeed. Tap into you Uber
self. A vertical approach is the best - we need a paradigm shift,
but we can and will get there.
We're not out of the woods yet, and we support an alternative solution
if it makes sense. We need to whiteboard the plan to make this a win-win
deal. With all due respect, it is not merely a zero sum game.
* * * * *
This nonsensical article has been constructed from the most hated phrases lists† collected on the RF Cafe Forum, as the
result of a Smorgasbord item that reported on Cambridge University's 2008 list of
Top 10 Irritating Phrases. Phrases were used in alphabetical order, that is without
attempting to select the best phrase for the paragraph flow. That demonstrates how
easy it is to make a completely meaningless monolog seem familiar... if not irritating.
Sadly, its mocking tone could easily be part of a real conversation in today's business
world. Please, join other RF Cafe visitors and add your own personal least favorites
to the list.
† Italicized words in the article above are taken in alphabetical order
from the lists.