These tech-centric jokes,
song parodies, anecdotes and assorted humor have been collected from friends and
websites across the Internet. This humor is light-hearted and sometimes slightly
offensive to the easily-offended, so you are forewarned. It is all workplace-safe.
This list came from the Portland Amateur Radio
Club website, that notes: "Originated by Mike Lazaroff KB3RG. Downloaded from the
'Wireless Institute of Australia, New South Wales Division' Web Pages on the Internet,
and slightly Anglicised by myself.
- The only time you get up at 6am is for a hamfest.
- You know you can run all your home appliances on your equipment back-up battery.
- Someone in a Music shop asks you what bands you like and you answer two meters
and seventy centimeters.
- A bank clerk asks you to spell your name and you do so phonetically.
- In a conversation, you wait for the Roger tone before speaking.
- You hear a scraping sound when driving through multi-storey car parks.
- A band opening is more important than a grand opening.
- Sight-seeing on holiday amounts to looking at rooftops for antennas.
- The radios in your car are worth more than your car.
- When you walk out of the house you not only feel your pockets for your keys
and your wallet, but also your hip for your handheld.
- Your child's schoolteacher calls you on the phone to ask why your child identified
countries on the world map as JA, ZL, VE, G, UA and XE.
- If you refer to your house as "Ohm, sweet Ohm".
- You're talking on the phone and end every sentence with "(callsign) this is
- Your prime criterion for a new car is that it have zero ignition noise.
- You and your girlfriend/wife hike to the top of a famous mountain, but rather
than enjoy the magnificent sunset and giving her a kiss, you fire up the Hand Portable
to see how many repeaters you can hit.
- You realize that you've been studying code too long because you try and find
out who did it in 'Inspector Morse' by listening to the background music.
- You look at the Pennine Mountain Range and try to figure out how to get an antenna
mounted on the highest peak.
- You look at the Severn Bridge and develop a plan to get it to resonate on 160