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The Importance of Correct Punctuation

Take a break from the drudgery with some of these jokes, song parodies, anecdotes and assorted humor that has been collected from friends & from websites across the Internet. This humor is light-hearted and sometimes slightly offensive to the easily-offended, so you are forewarned. I have taken care to censor "humor" with reproductive function innuendo and hateful tirades, so it is all workplace-safe. I have also tried to warn of any links that will result in audio clips so you can take appropriate precautions. Please send any potential candidates for this humor page to the e-mail link above.

Humor #1 | Humor #2 | Humor #3



Engineers are notorious for, to put it kindly, "creative" grammar. Misspellings, improper capitalization (or no capitalization), misplaced commas, semicolons and quotation marks, using adjectives where adverbs belong, etc. As with the examples of sentences you see where all the vowels are removed and you can still comprehend the meaning, most texts written by engineers are understandable in spite of the grammatical atrocities that have been committed. Well, here is one brilliant example of where punctuation completely alters the meaning of the paragraph.

The words in the two paragraphs are exactly the same; only the punctuation and capitalization has been changed.


Dear John:

I want a man who knows what love is all about. You are generous, kind, thoughtful. People who are not like you admit to being useless and inferior. You have ruined me for other men. I yearn for you. I have no feelings whatsoever when we're apart. I can be forever happy--will you let me be yours?

Gloria




Dear John:

I want a man who knows what love is. All about you are generous, kind, thoughtful people, who are not like you. Admit to being useless and inferior. You have ruined me. For other men, I yearn. For you, I have no feelings whatsoever. When we're apart, I can be forever happy. Will you let me be?

Yours, Gloria


 

--- Anon

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