Take a break from the drudgery with some of these jokes, song parodies, anecdotes and assorted humor
that has been collected from friends & from websites across the Internet. This humor is light-hearted
and sometimes slightly offensive to the easily-offended, so you are forewarned. I have taken care
to censor "humor" with overt sexual overtones (or undertones), degrading political taunts, and hateful
tirades, so it is all workplace-safe. I have also tried to warn of any links that will result in audio
clips so you can take appropriate precautions. Please send any potential candidates for this humor
page to the e-mail link above.
| Humor #2 | Humor #3
Here is a list of good common sense points that somebody sent me in an e-mail:
- Why do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front?
- Ever notice how some people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and then a diet coke?
- Why do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters?
- Why is it that we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage?
- How come do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight?
- The etymology of 'politics' is aptly formed from 'poli,' which in Latin means 'many,' and the word 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.
- Can someone tell me why do we have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering?
- Every wonder why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
- Why is it that women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
- Notice that you don't ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"? (I love this one!)
- Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
- Is there a good reason why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
- Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
- Tell me why the man who invests all my money is called a broker?
- Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
- Wouldn't you think there'd be a mouse-flavored cat food?
- If only Noah had swatted those two mosquitoes!
- Why doesn't the wool on a sheep's back shrink when it rains?
- Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
- If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?