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Take a break from the drudgery with some of these jokes, song parodies, anecdotes and assorted humor that has been collected from friends & from websites across the Internet. This humor is light-hearted and sometimes slightly offensive to the easily-offended, so you are forewarned. I have taken care to censor "humor" with overt sexual overtones (or undertones) and hateful tirades, so it is all workplace-safe. I have also tried to warn of any links that will result in audio clips so you can take appropriate precautions. Please send any potential candidates for this humor page to the e-mail link above.

Humor #1 | Humor #2 | Humor #3


  • Cannot find REALITY.SYS. Universe halted.
  • COFFEE.EXE Missing - Insert Cup and Press Any Key.
  • <-------- The information went data way --------
  • Best file compression around: "DEL. = 100% COMPRESSION
  • The Definition of an UPGRADE: Take old bugs out, Put New Ones In.
  • BREAKFAST.COM Halted...Cereal Port Not Responding
  • BUFFERS=20 FILES=15 2nd Down, 4th Quarter, 5 Yards to Go!
  • Access denied-nah nah na nah nah!
  • C:\> Bad command or file name! Go stand In The Corner.
  • Bad command. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaay...
  • Why doesn't DOS ever say "EXCELLENT command or filename!"
  • As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.
  • Backups? We don' NEED no Steenking backups.
  • E Pluribus Modem
  • .... File not found. Should I Fake It? (Y/N)
  • A mainframe: The biggest PC peripheral available.
  • An error? Impossible! My Modem is Error Correcting.
  • CONGRESS.SYS Corrupted: Re-boot Washington D.C. (Y/N)?
  • A computer's attention span is as long as it's Power Cord.
  • Windows: Just another pane in the glass.
  • SENILE.COM found . . . Out Of Memory . . .
  • Who's General Failure & why is he reading My Disk?
  • Ultimate office automation: Networked Coffee.
  • RAM disk is not an installation procedure.
  • All computers wait at the same speed.
  • Smash forehead on keyboard to continue.....
  • ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSI!
  • Error: Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to Continue.
  • Hidden DOS secret: Add BUGS=OFF to your CONFIG.SYS
  • Press any key to continue or any OTHER key to quit...
  • Buy a Pentium 586/200 so you can reboot faster.
  • 2 + 2 = 5 for Extremely Large values of 2.
  • Press any key...... no, No, NO!! Not THAT one!



...thanks to Steve for this one
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